The Great Commandment: Loving Others is Enough

I had an extremely hard day at work today, and most especially after still struggling with mild to moderate anxiety.  Making things more difficult, there was a gentleman who there was no doubt was quite upset at me, or perhaps just upset in general.  Especially after struggling with fatigue, tiredness, stress, a cold, and the anxiety all together made it much more difficult to focus and really try to understand how to get organized in this situation and to resolve all of the work I had to do.

I left work feeling down-hearted and somewhat miserable.  The only consolation was that I was able to make some new friends and to be kind to others.  As I was driving home listening to General Conference, I listened as Elder Eyering quoted the Savior, and I felt Heavenly Father letting me know that it was still a good day, because through it all I tried to love others and to love Him and keep Him in my thoughts.  This is what was quoted:

36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law?

 37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.

 38 This is the first and great commandment.

 39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

 40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.  (Matt 22:36-40)

What had  been my focus? What was it that I really tried to do today?  Though I was so imperfect in my work, yet I was most certainly striving to live the Great Commandment, to love God with my heart, soul, and mind and to love my neighbor as myself.  What more could be asked of me?

It made me think about my own difficulties with anxiety, and related to this:  OCD.  I focus on the little things sometimes, and these consume me to the point that if I don't get all the little, mundane details right, I feel dejected and worthless.  Yet God and Christ have such a different, such a wonderful and an amazing standard:  love them and love others.  This can be hard in and of itself, but when it does become our primary focus, it makes everything else so much easier!  I don't need to think about those little details as much as I do the big picture:  how I keep God close and how I treat and feel about others.

Also coming to my mind in my distress, especially when I was feeling sorry for those were not very nice to me in my difficulties, was the desire to pray for them, that they might be filled with love, that their hearts might be softened even a little bit.  These words from the Lord to Moroni came to me:

36 And it came to pass that I prayed unto the Lord that he would give unto the Gentiles grace, that they might have charity.

 37 And it came to pass that the Lord said unto me: If they have not charity it mattereth not unto thee, thou hast been faithful; wherefore, thy garments shall be made clean. And because thou hast seen thy weakness thou shalt be made strong, even unto the sitting down in the place which I have prepared in the mansions of my Father. (Ether 12:36-37)

I realized that perhaps my desires were for them to be nicer to me, so that I wouldn't be as afraid.  Yet, I cannot do anything about their choices, nor their attitude.  It is ultimately up to them what they will choose.  All that I can do is love, truly love to the best of my ability.  That is enough, and Christ will help make me strong enough to handle their unkindness if I need to bear it.

God sure is wonderful, and His Gospel amazing!  Though I may still be in a lot of pain, and the difficulties and trials I faced todayare still hard to bear, I know that God will strengthen me in my need.  It will still be painful, but more bearable with a knowledge of God's love and His Son's Atonement.

Love you all, my dear friends and whoever may read this!

"For God hath not given us the Spirit of fear, but of love, and of power, and of a sound mind."  (2 Tim. 1:7)